You want to what??

"Mom, I want to clean the basement."
--THUD--

"Mom... MOM??  You ok?"

Yeah. Sure.  I'll be fine once I check my hearing and put an ice pack on my head. Maybe I'll keep dreaming long enough for the basement LOOK clean!   Obviously that statement came from B, not Monster Man, but he's grudgingly down there making a slight effort to help. His effort seemed to improve after I heard B remind him, "This is your stuff too! You need to help! Do you want your stuff to go in the trash? Hmmm?? You'd better get these train tracks picked up!!" 
"FINE!'  he grumbled and growled as I heard wooden Thomas tracks being thrown angrily into the track box.   He must have moved on from tracks to cooking as I heard, "Where did the kitchen set go?"
B asks, 'The one we sold at the yard sale?"
"What yard sale?"
"The yard sale in summer..."
"I do NOT remember that- where is the kitchen set?! I NEED an oven!!"
So Monster Man tromps up the stairs to ask me. I told him yes, we got rid of it this past summer.
"But I still played with that!"
"Dude, it's been gone over 4 months and you JUST now noticed??"
He tromps down the stairs, "FINE. I won't bake anything today...or ever AGAIN!" 
How quickly he forgets that just yesterday under the couch was a perfect Play-Doh cookie oven... :-D

Both of them are still working, an hour later, intermittently arguing and yelling at each other.  I'm not too concerned with light arguing.  I do fuss at them about getting along, but nothing they've done is even in the ballpark to the extreme fighting my sisters and I did.  I have too many battle scars to count.  The items broken around our house growing up was of epic proportion- including each other.  I'm sure there isn't a school friend or boyfriend that doesn't remember one sister in particular hurling a drinking glass/shoe/hairspray can/ book/etc at our heads...or being chased around our house with a knife, broom or tennis racket.  Ironically, not matter how big the fight, one hint that mom was on the way home or a relative was pulling up, we all jumped high-gear into clean-up mode like nothing ever happened...the battle would continue another day.


Anyway, I believe I still hear progress in the basement. I'll take whatever I can get-- I'm not going down there unless I hear a skull smash or see blood splatter coming up the stairs. 

We can see the light!

At the end of the school-year tunnel--WOOHOOO!! Bright, uplifting rays of sunshine are filling the days and pushing out memories of the gloomy dreary previous months. Kids are anxious for neighborhood baseball games and bikes to consume their days as opposed to history and math lessons.* I'm as excited about approaching summer days as the kids are! Thankfully Monster Man has already completed his required hours, with only a few phonics/language arts lessons left and not quite three weeks of history. He's the tough one to keep focused on lessons with the sunshine peeking in the windows. Just two days ago, Monster Man got himself up, dressed quietly, and was outside riding his bike at 7:25 am! Guess he figured he'd get himself in a couple laps before mom could chase after him with a history lesson! At least he was dressed and had on his helmet! We do take advantage of the front yard swing to read and work in the fresh air. If during the day I "lose" B, she can often be found in the swing with her nose in a book, oblivious to the world around her or that I've called her name loud enough the next county is on alert. B is also nearing the end of her studies, though not as far progress-wise as Monster Man. She should be fulfill her hours by June 1, though will probably take another week after to finish her lessons to the 90% mark. She has been a tough one to keep "interested" in school work this year; her distraction has been a love of Thoroughbred series, Spiderwick, Goosebumps, Mostly Ghostly and RL Stein's Haunted series. The difficult task is getting her to turn her love of those books and direct some time and effort into writing about them, writing being her least favorite thing to do of course. Not necessarily book reports, but news articles, interviews, poems about the characters or settings and songs. She loves to sing and will talk your ear off about each story...my job is to get her to WRITE down her ideas. Though I can't complain too much, she has read over 100 books this school year- easily. Not counting the stories she reads to MM every night before bed. She is my bookworm. Now if I could only get math problems out of her as easily! :-D

At any rate, the countdown to summer has begun!


*Formal lessons anyway. Both kids always help cook, shop and do daily activities around the house in which math and problem solving skills are practiced incognito-hehehe.

Beaming!

Don't they look as proud as punch?? Mr. FixIt got this 9-point the first day of deer gun season in the evening. Yes, it was the first day, but he'd seen 16 deer so far that day and this buck was chasing a group of 6. Nice shot. Nice big deer. LOTS of meat!! He's already had a couple processed this year during bow season so we have a good bit of burger, but he does like to butcher some himself for roasts, steaks and stew meat. And of course the loin--oh man, first thing he pulled out, the backstraps- some season-all and cooked them in the cast iron skillet. OH MAN!! is that yuu-uummy!! Can't get a more juicy, flavorful steak than that! Ok, those who don't eat venison I'll quit making you sick. :-D B posed in this pic with him just because she was happy her daddy got a buck. She's been so worried, wanting him to get a nice buck, lol. She was with him in bow season and helped him get a very nice-sized doe a few weeks before. She jkept watch, picked out the doe, told her dad where to aim and when to release the bow. He nailed it so she helped drag it out of the woods. She can be a girly girl at times and knows how to turn on the drama, but she is definitely a hunter which makes Mr. Fix It, even more proud! She's talking about taking a gun safety course in the spring. I'm sure my mother will have fits, but she's about the age I was when I took a gun class and shot a 12-gauge for the first time. Adding fuel to this fire is the fact that our nieces, B's age and a year younger, both went gun hunting this year- one got a doe and her sister "gave one a haircut" lol. So B definitely wants to keep up with her cousins. I know in some families the guys are hunting crazy but I think our girls can give them a run for their deer. :-D Hey, I wonder if hunting with guns will scare off potential boyfriendsin the future or make them more attracted??? Maybe we can work on intimidating those boys and keeping them away....FAR away!!

Grandpa's Teeth

If you know my dad, you know he can be completely obnoxious, loud-mouthed and disgusting. The older he gets, the worse he gets and sometimes, as much as we love him, he is hard to be around. Meal time is the worst. I mean look at this:

That's a man on a mission, pork tenderloin the size of a house cat in hand. Would you want to sit across from this man while he woofs that down?? That's his best bud sitting "beside" him in the choice spot. Sorry D, I didn't take time to fuzz out your face...I'm on a time crunch here...so the world knows who you hang with. Sorry about your luck!


Most of Dad's mealtime problem is due to his teeth or lack of which drives my middle sister the dental hygienist absolutely bonkers! (note, no teeth in above pic) Due to head injuries, smoking, rubbing snuff and lots of indulgence over the years, dad's teeth literally were falling out of his head. The teeth were hard as rocks, but his gums had become tissue paper and wet tissue paper doesn't hold many rocks! So, over the course of last year he had several painful episodes of having his upper teeth removed, surgery to fix his mouth/bone structure and finally fitting for upper dentures, which still don't fit correctly. (They're in his t-shirt pocket in the above pic- he'd just cleared half a table by yanking them out and trying to pass them around.) First problem with all this teeth business is Dad will "...never get old. I'll out live all of ya!" Second problem Dad constantly reminds us, "You are so lucky you have a daddy this good lookin'!" Third problem--losing teeth and getting dentures signifies he's getting old and defy those first two problems. The fourth problem being he's a major wise ass and pulling his dentures out repeatedly just to screw with everyone makes him really hard to eat dinner with. Especially when we visit because my lovely daughter has a serious gag reflex at the mere thought of something disgusting. She doesn't have to see it. Mention vomit or slobber at the dinner table and your punishment is cleaning up her puke trail from the table to wherever she landed in crumpled heap on the floor. Even Monster Man at 4 years old knows this. Though bizarre side note- gutting and butchering deer does NOT bother her. We can talk blood and guts at the table, just nothing resembling saliva or vomit.

So we are eating dinner at an awesome sea food place, BackBay, while visiting mom and dad in Morgantown. Monster Man was fussing he wanted this, wanted that, wants his food NOW. He's STARVING and can't wait! We adults had been served our delicious crab soups and dad was divvying up bread trying to distract MM. Note that my dad doesn't share food...at all. You'll lose a limb trying to get food from anywhere near his plate, but he was offering bread, crackers, drink of his Bloody Mary, anything to get MM to chill out. MM stopped for a second and you could see the wheels spinnin' in that devious mind. He blurted out very loudly, "Grandpa? I want your......TEETH!! The ones out of YOUR HEAD!"

Oh my lord. We almost lost B right there. Just at the thought he might pull those teeth out. She'd only had a few sips of her juice and some crackers by this point, but she was turning three shades of green. Mom and I choked in surprise and laughter, tried not to waste that amazing soup by sputtering it across the table. Dad near lost his drink, asking, "What the hell did he say?!" Monster man squealed in delight that he'd made us all laugh and poor B hung her head between her knees and tried to keep her toenails from coming up through her esophagus. After mom slapped dad for reaching for his teeth, since he didn't notice B was almost a casualty, things settled. B's color evened out, and we all enjoyed our dinner. Though not without a few giggles and perplexed head shaking.

You never know what that boy will say.

Dear B,

Two wheels! Yes, finally! You did it! It has been a long, three-year struggle to get you on those wheels but you did it! I am so proud of you! I don't know where you finally snagged the confidence from, but you out of the blue today you came to me and asked for your bike that you haven't touched in 8 months, grabbed your helmet, jumped on and away you went! YESS!!

Way to go B!

Love you!

Mom

To: B

To my B,

To my oldest. The beautiful girl who has my green eyes and daddy's long lashes, my distractability and daddy's sense of adventure. My always glowing, joyful and thoughtful child who never ceases to amaze me with your generosity to others and curiosity of the world. You have such a spark for life and take in every minute as an opportunity to learn something interesting. Never ceasing your exploration of the yard or a barn or the sky, comparing the trees and flowers surrounding you, not to mention getting up close and personal with every living critter whether that be a strange looking insect or the horses at Mr. E's barn. You love all beings equally as God intended. I am so proud of the knowledge you have acquired over the recent few years through your search for information by reading about your many discoveries. Also makes me beam when you go out of your way to think of others or to help someone. Amazing a child that will make cards for people "just because" or will pick up the neighbors' blown over trash without being asked or quickly grabbing what someone unknowingly dropped and giving it back to them. Several times you surprised me by fixing a nice lunch for us all because you knew I was swamped with work and just needed to finish 'one last thing.' You even have patience and show love to your brother, who I know must drive you to the point of pure hatred at times. You can get him to change his tune and turn him around in an instant! You are a natural teacher, and I hope you will use those abilities when you are blessed with your own children one day (hold that thought for 10 or 15 years please) or in whatever future road of life you travel. You aren't afraid of new things or adventures. You could just as easily be found helping daddy butcher a deer, willingly no less, or going to a drag race even though you don't like loud noises and were thankful for heavy hearing protection!

I want you to know you are a treasure to have around with the never-ending stories and a giggle close at hand. A thespian at heart with endless imagination shown early by galloping around from the time you could walk and always making up jokes or dances and songs. Did I mention the your singing?? Always the entertainer!

Most of all my dear B, I don't tell you often enough that I love you. A hundred times each day would not even be a start. I hope that over the years you can fully appreciate how special you are to me and how truly blessed I am to have you as a daughter. I never imagined such an intelligent, beautiful and caring young lady could be called mine. I love you Smidgedoodle....

now pass me a Kleenex before your momma drowns.

Love ya,
Mom