What a week!

This week I've done one of the most difficult things of my life. Something I've struggled with for a long time if I "should" do and not until now had I even felt I had a shred of the strength to attempt. Good news is, what I did was a good decision. I feel a calm I haven't known for a long L.O.N.G. time. Amazing.

Hopefully in a few days I can put the whole mess out in the open to start moving past it. My immediate family knows though I need to talk with my grandparents before I can broadcast anything (bear with me). Sorry. I just had to let the world know that despite a grueling week with potential for serious disaster, I feel better and happier than I have in years!

I should have done this YEARS ago!

I've fallen off the bloggy world wagon as there have been some changes around here. I've been feeling much better lately and therefore not like a slug in the chair on the computer every evening! :-D
I started a post about finally trying to face the demons in my head, but I never published it. One day, I'll finish it, but I'll give you the outcome: After few weeks of medication for depression I FEEL GREAT! I am in shock at how "normal" I feel and in totally embarrassed at the same time petrified at how much of the last few years I've spent beating myself up and an emotional train wreck...and I lived like THAT! For years and years!! The thought hit me last week, "I haven't cried for two weeks! OMG! I should have done this YEARS ago!! " So I am enjoying listening to music and not becoming a sap...I sang Whitney Houston's version of I'll Always Love You..the whole THING, not ONE TEAR!! I'm not snapping at the kids as much. I seem to be back to my patience of teaching days years ago. For their sake, I SHOULD have done this years ago. A bonus is it has slightly helped the ADD, just a bit. I can still get distracted faster than mosquitoes attack you in a Carolina swamp, but hey, I'm so excited to feel like a normal person, my erratic attention span is something I can deal with!

One other VERY exciting thing about life right now is I have become an independent distributor for Premier Designs jewelry!! I have loved Premier jewelry for more than a couple years and when we lived in SC I'd hosted and attended home shows, most done by my friend Katrina. We had talked about me joining Premier, but at the time I was working full time+ in transcription, mostly evenings and weekends and felt a loyalty to the service I was working for, I just could not quit. Plus we were not in great financial state at that time, I couldn't afford the start-up or any time off to get a business going. Though I loved the jewelry and friendship it had brought me, I couldn't do it. Fast forward three years later, living in Ohio. I still wear all of my Premier pieces all the time, though when people would ask me about what I was wearing, they'd not heard of Premier. How could people not know of this awesome jewelry and business!! One day I found Katrina on Facebook, "oh my gosh will she remember me??" :-D Haha! Well she did, and we talked about the business. Drum roll......... My samples have arrived, I'm working on some bookings, my training show will be in early June- I am going to share my love of Premier!! I should have done THIS years ago!! I am so excited to be a part of such a wonderful company!! Though I don't consider myself a jewelry lady. yet. Maybe once I get a few shows under my belt...then maybe! :-D

The final "should've done that" is more personal and I can't give details yet. Sorry you don't get any juicy bits or crazy stories until I get a few things worked out. But I can tell you- I've been through it before. More than once. I'm fine. The kids are fine. I'm just finally going to do what needs done. What should have been done. A LONG time ago. Wish me luck. I'll post more later.

Guess who?

Guess who Monster Man studied today in history?? Sorry you have to turn your head, lol.

We can see the light!

At the end of the school-year tunnel--WOOHOOO!! Bright, uplifting rays of sunshine are filling the days and pushing out memories of the gloomy dreary previous months. Kids are anxious for neighborhood baseball games and bikes to consume their days as opposed to history and math lessons.* I'm as excited about approaching summer days as the kids are! Thankfully Monster Man has already completed his required hours, with only a few phonics/language arts lessons left and not quite three weeks of history. He's the tough one to keep focused on lessons with the sunshine peeking in the windows. Just two days ago, Monster Man got himself up, dressed quietly, and was outside riding his bike at 7:25 am! Guess he figured he'd get himself in a couple laps before mom could chase after him with a history lesson! At least he was dressed and had on his helmet! We do take advantage of the front yard swing to read and work in the fresh air. If during the day I "lose" B, she can often be found in the swing with her nose in a book, oblivious to the world around her or that I've called her name loud enough the next county is on alert. B is also nearing the end of her studies, though not as far progress-wise as Monster Man. She should be fulfill her hours by June 1, though will probably take another week after to finish her lessons to the 90% mark. She has been a tough one to keep "interested" in school work this year; her distraction has been a love of Thoroughbred series, Spiderwick, Goosebumps, Mostly Ghostly and RL Stein's Haunted series. The difficult task is getting her to turn her love of those books and direct some time and effort into writing about them, writing being her least favorite thing to do of course. Not necessarily book reports, but news articles, interviews, poems about the characters or settings and songs. She loves to sing and will talk your ear off about each story...my job is to get her to WRITE down her ideas. Though I can't complain too much, she has read over 100 books this school year- easily. Not counting the stories she reads to MM every night before bed. She is my bookworm. Now if I could only get math problems out of her as easily! :-D

At any rate, the countdown to summer has begun!


*Formal lessons anyway. Both kids always help cook, shop and do daily activities around the house in which math and problem solving skills are practiced incognito-hehehe.

Sweet

The NaBloPoMo theme for this month- "sweet" The only thing that comes to mind is that pathetic Splenda commercial where everyone thinks/says "Sweet" after tasting something made with that chemical crap. I have a few choice S-words for Splenda and "sweet" isn't even close. I'll take my fat and calories DIRECLTY from the source, thanks...pass the sugar.

Though, I'll be a sport and play along. At least for the first day of this challenge.

Wouldn't it be sweet if:
-the sun could shine everyday??
-Monster Man would show his well-behaved non-ornery side for just a few extra minutes a day?? (total 5 is all I'm askin' here)
-in this lifetime I could get my arse into those size 10's?? (hell, I'll take 12's at this point)
-Kitty cat Elwood would stop pissing in random places in the basement!!
-Mr. FixIt would hit the lottery, buy me a big chunk of land so I could let kids and critters roam??
-B could get those pesky multiplication facts to sink in and "click"...she's been trying SO hard!
-I could actually blog EVERY day and finally get through a Nablopomo??

Those wouldn't be sweet....those would ROCK!